I don’t really want to. Be my mother, I mean. It’s not that I don’t love my mother. It’s just that she’s so … how can I put this gently? … old. Not anciently old. In fact, she’s only 20 years older than me. But it seems that something happens to us when we reach a certain age. We grow cautious and don’t care for change and our faces get loose and jiggly. (Not necessarily in that order.) And I don’t want that to happen to me. I used to say that I wasn’t afraid of anything, but truth be told, I’m afraid of getting old. I talk a good game about how we should respect age and the wisdom that comes with it, and I frequently remind the older members of my congregation how much they still have to contribute to the church and to the world, but I don’t know that I really believe it. I don’t want to be old. I don’t want to lose control of my parts. Any of them. But more and more I find myself thinking and acting and looking like my mother. Who is this woman I am becoming? And who invited her to my party?
The blog regarding mothers
I learned good and didn’t learn things from my long lost mother.
I tried not to be poor by attending college to get a good job, like she ended up being.
I believe in God, which she didn’t agree with.
I try to keep my physique acceptable by dressing accordingly and acting accordingly, she didn’t.
I look in the mirror at times and can see her in me.
I have tried, but the devil had me binded up for a good decade, I sometimes wonder if my mom put a curse on me.
I prayed frivilantly earlier this year for a job. Which is a hard thing to get anymore. I got one at Sears. God never promised I would be wealthy. He promised he would give us a tree to protect us from evil and bad weather.
My mom suffered from terminal cancer, I make sure I get precautionary exams.
My son is a lot like my mother, go figure. I can’t talk about God. He claims I shoved it down his throut. I remember him riding his bicycle over 10 miles to go to church classes. This new wife swayed him, she has never been to church, I can’t talk about God. She said it’s a cult.
I give up trying to have a family, at least I can pick my friends!